SAD

Note to self: Lighters and bottle caps are not as digestible as I once thought.

This is horrible. Dispose of your shit properly, people! 

Insane. 

If we train the birds to all land and die in a pile, we have our first 'natural' landfill. 

This depresses me. I dont think a link posted here has ever so closely ever brought a tear to my eye. i think most of that though has to do with all my knowledge of an alabatross comes from The Rescuers and The Rescuers Down Under.

10-12 foot wingspans fully grown, on average. the largest recorded is 17 feet. thats just ridiculous. such a beautiful bird. senseless deaths. 

Awesome, one of those birds had enough Coke reward caps to earn a free 2 liter. 

While pollution is evil and all...I can't help but think how incredibly stupid these birds are. I would think most animals, after eating 19 indigestible bottle caps, would pass on the 20th.

But more than that I have trouble believing they lived long enough to eat all that stuff. Some of those piles of garbage were as big as the birds were, when any one or two pieces would've been enough to cause serious pain. 

skribblescratch said:

Awesome, one of those birds had enough Coke reward caps to earn a free 2 liter.

I am laughing my way into Hell. 

Over time, natural selection will weed out the individuals that cant see a difference between fish and lighters. These pictures make me sad, but until the ginormous Trash Vortex in the pacific is cleaned up, they will adapt. There are a lot of these huge birds thriving on the fish their folks fed them. Since the others will never reproduce, there will be fewer of them over time.

Its too bad evolution gave them a shitty deck to begin with. Why allow something down the throat thats to big to pass out the ass? 

This is the stuff that I try to force everyone I know to see so that they can know that their actions have consequences. After all, we have such a throw away and forget society it's pretty disturbing. I think the worst part is that most of them don't care... 

I knew a guy who swallowed a lighter for a bet, then was robbed at fist point. 

Stupid birds. 

Natural selection at its finest.

I mean... not that I like seeing this stuff or I don't think we're destroying the earth by the way we treat it, but come on. Wise up you stupid birds. 

Yeah, the pollution sucks, and I hate seeing anything suffer unnecessarily, but....

I was never one for chucking things in storm drains or rivers or into the surf, and I pay my bill for waste management services who (presumably) dispose of the shit in my hefty bags in a landfill, not the ocean, and the last time I checked, the number of countries who could claim a slice of the Pacific Ocean was large, and the number globally who have ports or a shoreline are even more numerous.

So unless you specifically know of some act of great environmental douchebaggery YOU committed personally, don't let the Environmental Stasi beat you up too bad about this.

I don't see the world going back to being totally OK with armpit hair on women, communal living in huts, and bicycles, so we will just have to apply ingenuity to problems like garbage vortices as they appear... 

EWWWWW

gyrocaps said:

Wise up you stupid birds.

wow! 

Chicks that swallow.....meh 

Doesn't look like fish...
Doesn't smell like fish...
Doesn't feel like fish...
Doesn't taste like fish...

Not fish. 

gyrocaps said:

Wise up you stupid birds.

Without our polluting ways they would be no need for them to wise up, as they could safely presume that what appears to be food actually is. And if we demand all creatures to become as "wise" as we profess to be I'd hate to see the state of this planet. One "wise" race is more than enough I think... 

So that's where my lighter went. 

Am I the only one who thinks that some of these looked kinda staged?

I know that birds have lungs as well and that their stomachs don't take up their entire torso
yet the piles of plastic are just as big as the carcasses.

As sad as it may be, something about the pictures just seems off to me. 

It's like a sad I-Spy game...I see lighters, bottle caps, a rubber tip from a cane or chair leg, a syringe, a callus shaver, a toy bear.... 

PoopNinja said:

Without our polluting ways they would be no need for them to wise up, as they could safely presume that what appears to be food actually is. And if we demand all creatures to become as "wise" as we profess to be I'd hate to see the state of this planet. One "wise" race is more than enough I think...

While the sentiment behind your statement is on target, the fact that these stupid fucks ate things that don't even remotely look, feel, smell, or taste like what they eat pretty much seals the deal for people that are saying this is standard survival of the fittest. All the retard chicks get weeded out so their idiot genes aren't passed on and on for generations. Not all the chicks are stupid enough to eat this shit, and not all parent birds are dumb enough to spot a pile of fishing line, bottle caps, and lighters and think, "man, my kids would love that!" 

Soreign said:

Am I the only one who thinks that some of these looked kinda staged?

True. Everone knows that marine pollution is nothing but a liberal conspiracy to constrain the free market. Like climate change and this alleged financial crisis. 

Not all the chicks are stupid enough to eat this shit, and not all parent birds are dumb enough to spot a pile of fishing line, bottle caps, and lighters and think, "man, my kids would love that!"

We had to lock away the cleaning products and pills, as well as having label warnings on pretty much everything, like coffee cups and plastic bags, to remind us that babies will burn or choke themselves.
You're saying the chicks are dumb... but actually they're babies, and will act like most babies do, eating whatever the parents feed them.
As for the parents, so they're not that smart. But that still takes me back to my initial point. If we know this, we should ensure that we do not pollute the waters.

Oh, and we eat some weird shit too... Not an exclusively albatrossy thing to do.
http://wrongtown.blogspot.com/2006/01/man-eats-plane.html 

After having worked with many MANY different animals I have this to say:

Sea birds are fucking stupid.

They basically have no other predators in the air other than birds. So there has never been a real need for them to develop any amount of intelligence.

Now look at birds that live in areas with all sorts of predators and more difficult prey than just scooping fish out of the water and you start to get smarter birds.

Crows, Parrots etc.

Even still birds are crazy stupid. 

man that's depressing, some of those poor things are absolutely stuffed 

Oh. Now that was unpleasant. 

reoiv said:

Even still birds are crazy stupid.

Yeah, pretty fucking stupid alright... 

There are starving kids in Africa who would give their left arm for a belly full of bottlecaps. 

Scooter said:

While pollution is evil and all...I can't help but think how incredibly stupid these birds are. I would think most animals, after eating 19 indigestible bottle caps, would pass on the 20th.

I have to agree. I've tested Seagulls by throwing food at them, and then throwing shells or other inedible items. They will touch the item but not even pick it up...so either a lot smarter than the albatross or have had good selection over the years.

It's like that bunch of seals and their babies that got stranded on an iceberg years ago. Someone saved them all and I looked a decade into the future at a million seals that will all nest on the wrong iceberg, and need saving.

Or a turtle I saw laying an egg in broad daylight, and a crow just hovered around it to dig it up so it could eat it as soon as the turtle left. The smart turtles that lay their eggs in more covered areas or at night will win out over time. 

Evolve or die. I can't feel sorry for these stupid things. I have no clue what role they play in the eco-system except an organic trash bag.
As a member of the Food chain elite, I can confidently say good riddance to bad rubbish.
/*baddum kisk* 

PoopNinja said:

We had to lock away the cleaning products and pills, as well as having label warnings on pretty much everything, like coffee cups and plastic bags, to remind us that babies will burn or choke themselves.
You're saying the chicks are dumb... but actually they're babies, and will act like most babies do, eating whatever the parents feed them.
As for the parents, so they're not that smart. But that still takes me back to my initial point. If we know this, we should ensure that we do not pollute the waters.

Oh, and we eat some weird shit too... Not an exclusively albatrossy thing to do.
http://wrongtown.blogspot.com/2006/01/man-eats-plane.html

Dumb chicks/babies + dumb parents = dead chicks/babies. I see no problem with that. Yeah, it's sad, but that's life.

I have two young daughters, almost 3 and 4 years old, that are smart enough to not kill themselves on a daily basis, in a house with more hazards than I can possibly list. And before you ask; No, I do not have every danger under lock and key. Warning labels are for stupid parents that don't educate their kids. Of course bleach is a bad idea for bath-time fun, shotguns are not interchangeable for pogo-sticks, and a curling iron also makes for a poor speculum. It's common sense. I won't even get into the fact that most animals have more instinct for self-preservation than a human baby does, so this is even more ludicrous.

If your argument is that this is tragic and we should stop polluting as much as we do, I completely agree. If your argument is that this wouldn't happen if we didn't pollute, I'd have to vehemently disagree. The stupid fuckers would find something else to kill their imbecile offspring, with or without humans. 

IG88 said:

Dumb chicks/babies + dumb parents = dead chicks/babies. I see no problem with that. Yeah, it's sad, but that's life.

I have two young daughters, almost 3 and 4 years old, that are smart enough to not kill themselves on a daily basis, in a house with more hazards than I can possibly list. And before you ask; No, I do not have every danger under lock and key. Warning labels are for stupid parents that don't educate their kids. Of course bleach is a bad idea for bath-time fun, shotguns are not interchangeable for pogo-sticks, and a curling iron also makes for a poor speculum. It's common sense. I won't even get into the fact that most animals have more instinct for self-preservation than a human baby does, so this is even more ludicrous.

If your argument is that this is tragic and we should stop polluting as much as we do, I completely agree. If your argument is that this wouldn't happen if we didn't pollute, I'd have to vehemently disagree. The stupid fuckers would find something else to kill their imbecile offspring, with or without humans.

I'd have to disagree with you on the curling iron. 

There once was a boat called the Exxon Valdez
which made its way through alaskan seas
it floundered on rocks
like a whore among cocks
Then leaked all its contents away :(

Nobody cared
and nothing was spared
until people said, "hey"
and took the bad oil away :)

They picked up sea lions
then started crying
as Dawn cleaned their troubles
and made sudsy bubbles
they let the sea lions go play.

they watched them in awe
as they entered the maws

Also, these pictures of albatross are shopped. . . you can clearly see the blurring around the edges.
of the orcas just offshore,
but the news didn't cover THAT gore . . 

So that's where my lighter went. 

I call fowl 

The Albatross will emerge stronger from this as a result, as all the smart albatross will breed successful, and all the albatross who can't tell a bottlecap from a worm will die.

See folks, natural selection.

PS - Bottlecaps are natural, honest. 

Really cool looking though. Desktop background, anyone? 

Scooter said:

While pollution is evil and all...I can't help but think how incredibly stupid these birds are. I would think most animals, after eating 19 indigestible bottle caps, would pass on the 20th.

Some people eat Twinkies. Go figure. 

I think I just saw my TV remote and car keys. 

i cant beleive how many people are trying to blame this on the birds being stupid. people, please. 

JohnHopkins said:

i cant beleive how many people are trying to blame this on the birds being stupid. people, please.

Please, what? Please stop littering as much because these stupid fucks keep killing off their idiotic offspring? Yeah, we've established that. The birds ARE stupid for both feeding this to their young, and not having the basic survival instinct to not eat it.

http://www.iucnredlist.org/apps/redlist/details/144905/0

IUNC said:

This species is classified as Vulnerable owing to a projected rapid decline over three generations (84 years) based on declines in populations at Midway Atoll, French Frigate Shoals and Laysan Island in the late 1990s and early 2000s. More recent data indicate that the breeding population may have rebounded (perhaps because apparent changes in the breeding populations reflected large scale environmental conditions that affected the number of birds that returned to the colonies to nest rather than actual declines in the population). If so, this species would warrant downlisting to Near Threatened.

84 years of decline is certainly not due to bottlecaps and lighters. They're stupid, and they aren't adapting fast enough. It sucks, humans certainly have a hand in it now, but to say it isn't their fault is just silly. 

They're stupid, and they aren't adapting fast enough.

give me a break. 

now that is silly. 

Smiley265 said:

Evolve or die. I can't feel sorry for these stupid things. I have no clue what role they play in the eco-system except an organic trash bag.
As a member of the Food chain elite, I can confidently say good riddance to bad rubbish.
/*baddum kisk*

Wow...you learn something new everyday. I learned that some of you are arrogant ignorant fools.

Food chain elites? Hahahaha! You are so far removed from the food chain it is sad. You are just like the baby birds with your mouths open, gobbling up whatever mass production/consumerism shoves down your gullet. Try living in the real world, away from your mother's teet, and see how far you make it. 

You guys are blaming the birds as if the birds can choose how smart they are or how fast they adapt. Doesn't anyone here understand how evolution actually works? 

JohnHopkins said:

You guys are blaming the birds as if the birds can choose how smart they are or how fast they adapt. Doesn't anyone here understand how evolution actually works?

Yes, actually, and that's why these birds are dying. I like how you chose to ignore the fact that they've been in decline for longer than those plastic items have been around. How convenient.

We're blaming the birds for being fucking stupid. Evolution works both ways. Smart animals that rely on a food source that's stable and consistent will survive. Smart animals that adapt to new food sources when their usual sources are exhausted will survive. Stupid animals that choose to provide things that kill their young when their initial food source is still available will die out. Seriously, it's not a hard concept to understand. You don't see me donning pom-poms and cheering their deaths. I'm simply stating that this is what happens when generation upon generation fails to adapt. 

So that's where my lighter went.

18, 34, 47 

animals don't decide to evolve because they are smart. and generations of birds don't fail to evolve because they are stupid. im not ignoring your example man. but evolution is not why these birds are dying. 

Your'e holding these birds to unrealistic level of intellect. They're birds, remember. They have no idea they're eating plastic, or what the man-made material is. It's not as though they know they're eating plastic, and decide to keep eating plastic. And its not as though they can decide to evolve a way around it.

"The birds should wise up," you say. Sure. The birds should call a meeting, and discuss this plastic menace. They need to organize, and selectively breed with each other, until they're smart enough to figure out what plastic is, and that it's not something to be eaten.

You're holding a species accountable for something that is beyond their ability to understand and control. Your insults to the birds as "stupid" and "idiotic" are pathetic, on a grand ecologically level.

But congratulations for winning the food chain content. 

Who said they decided anything? Evolution is the passing along of genes from generation to generation. If the stupid ones keep passing along genes to stupid offspring, then they will fade as a species. Eventually, all the stupid ones will die, leaving a handful of smart ones, (assuming there are smart ones in that group), and they will recover. If not, then it's game over for these guys. Evolution has everything to do with why these idiots are dying. Evolution takes into account multiple factors, including outside influence. in this case, humans are an issue that these birds must learn to deal with. Will they adapt to it, or will they die? That's basic evolution.